Finding my identity in food

I was born in Beijing and moved to Vienna when I was seven years old. Growing up, there was constant change, even when I was living in China between Beijing and Yunnan - two very opposite provinces with different languages, culture, traditions, climate and culinary landscapes.

Moving to Austria felt very sudden, I didn't speak any German and proper communication with other children was non existent. It didn't matter though, because I quickly realized that trading food is a great way to make friends. Exchanging a ham cheese sandwich with a snickers bar was easy, it's an universal language that everyone understood.

The first years after moving to Vienna, I mainly focused on learning the language and assimilate, so there was almost no contact to my grandparents in Beijing. My Chinese language skills were stuck at first grad elementary school and when we flew back to visit as a teen, conversations with my grandparents were very superficial. I think that was the time, I realized that food has become the most important way to connect with them.

Chinese food has become the solely important thing for me to feel connected to my grandparents, my roots, my heritage, Chinese culture and my identity. Through all the language barriers, generational trauma, cultural differences, food was the universal language we all spoke and understood non verbally. All of my most cherished memories as a kid circle around cooking, sharing and eating food, from the most mundane daily meals to special celebrations at Chinese New Year.

Food has helped me to understand my identity better and the struggles of not belonging to a particular place or culture. I will never be 100% Chinese in China and living in Germany, people will always perceive me as foreign. Food has taught me that one can be proud of particular roots, but is also allowed to change and evolve. The food that I cook is similar like me, true to its roots, but cooked a bit differently with things that are available in a new environment.

My way of cooking is very inspired by my grandparents in Beijing and my mum in Vienna. We've never been a family who loved to be in the kitchen for hours, but we loved good food. I like to create delicious simple dishes, that feels like I've been cooking for an hour, but in reality some of the recipes just take 10 minutes. All my recipes are accessible, since I'm not using any equipment or ingredients that are exclusive or expensive to get.

It fills me with the biggest joy, when it makes people recreating my recipes, because it's not only creating a delicious dish, but sharing moments and memories. I hope you come for the food, but stay for the connection.

Cheers, Sissi